The Game of Desire

available everywhere books are sold!



Apple Books Review

“Forget what you think you know about dating—sexologist Shan Boodram is here to take you back to school. In her funny, personable book, she asserts that landing the person of your dreams starts with you…Boodram dares to be blunt, but is never unkind.”




The game of desire has a perfect score on amazon reviews! what are you waiting for?

Love love love! I bought the audible book and also the kindle version. It’s a book about defining yourself, and how that relates to your love life. She takes 6 woman and puts them through her system for becoming your best, most bad ass self.
— Rissa



your gamemaster, shan boodram sexologist + intimacy expert

Shan Boodram is a certified sex educator and intimacy expert with over 35 million YouTube views alongside her mainstream coverage across ABC’s “The View,” MTV, The Steve Harvey Show, CNN, The New York Times, Entertainment Tonight. Cityline, The Rachael Ray Show, Forbes and Time Magazine.

Known by her community as “Shan Boody,” she was the relationship-expert host and a consulting producer for Facebook Watch’s, Make Up or Break Up and the host and executive producer of the Fullscreen series, Your Perfect Date. She has produced content for MTV, the US military, OkCupid, Esquire Magazine and the CBC. Boodram is the author of LAID, was a contributing writer for Freeform Network’s The Bold Type series, has written articles for Teen Vogue and Cosmopolitan.

Boodram is an ambassador for AIDS Healthcare Foundation and She is a member of the American Sexual Health Association and Trojan's Sexual Health Advisory Council. She is a certified sexologist and currently lives in Los Angeles with her husband where she is a full-time vocal advocate for healthy intimacy.


meet the players you will be following in the game of desire


Deshawn the scientist

I was so nervous, my mind was going a mile a minute with insecure questions. Are these girls going to like me? Is  Shan going to like me? Do I call her Shan or Shannon, we aren’t cool like that! Does she think we are all losers who can’t get men? Is it going to be some extreme makeover bullshit, like “sorry you’re just not pretty enough“ and that’s the solution? But the worst that could happen was that I would just end up single like I had been. So, here goes nothing.



I heard about Shan’s project because my friend sent me her Instagram post and told me that I should apply. I was pretty surprised to get the email from Shan that she wanted to hop on a call with me all of a sudden this thing became real. This was when I started to question if this was even something that I really wanted to do, but I decided to just keep going with it because there was nothing to lose at that point.



pricilla THE TECHNICIAN & mom

When I first saw the submission post I almost just scrolled on. Had it not been for my oh-so-blunt child I might not have submitted. It saddened me that at a young age my son had seemed so very cynical of relationships. When Shan notified me that I’d been selected, I screenshot the email and sent it to my best friend, LiLi. Immediately she replied, “We both knew that spot was yours. Congratulations an expert agrees that you're the train wreck we both knew you were.”


If you are anything like me, you might be doubtful this book can help. You probably doubt that anyone could help your very specially-doomed case, because your love life is trash in the most unique way. Could a few exercises, workshops and experiments really help? But to quote Aristotle via Shan Boody, we are what we repeatedly do and we are who we consistently choose to be, so choose better.



stephanie THE ANALYST

What does taking these quizzes about myself have to do with me dating, let alone finding dick. Like Shan, girl ALLLLLLLLL these damn questions, let’s get straight to it. I got to know a lot about the other women, but I’m not trying to date them!!!! But once I reflected on knowing myself I felt more confident in presenting my true self, so I get it Shan, it was a process, but thank you!



courtney the manager

I’m probably the oldest person here but I’m carefree and fun as fuck. I’m pretty close to moving to the countryside to find my husband because the men in big cities are all trash. So I figured I’d try this out first before I booked that plane ticket.



cherise the striking,

icy wildcard